Tells it to the peoples
I know it’s like a catchphrase of mine, but this time it’s true: Band Aids are racist. They are! I saw a very dark black man on the bus the other day with a Band Aid on his cheeks, and the fleshy-colored bandage really stuck out from the rest of his skin. They are clearly made for white people, and with this, I take umbrage.
I would love to see chef Gordon Ramsey try the shit he pulls on “Hell’s Kitchen” in a black restaurant. Just bring on the yellin’ and screamin’ and food throwin’, ya limey bastard, and see how the brothas and sistas respond.
I’ll be honest with you: sometimes I think it would be a good idea to go to AA or Jenny Craig. But I don’t want to set in a group of strangers or with some vapid, grinning diet counselor and dissect my life. I’d much rather enjoy recovery in some sort of seaside resort spa prison for three months, where all I had to eat was snow peas and mineral water, and all I had to do was meditate, get massages, and take nature walks (not uphill). My eating habits are out of of control. My drinking habits go unchecked. But I don’t need AA or Jenny Craig. I just need some luxury retreat asylum!
