*Ring!* *Ring!*
An all too typical phone conversation between me and an employee at work:
Me: "Human Resources. This is Josh."
Employee: "Oh, hi, Josh! I was just wondering if I could make an appointment with you to go over becoming benefited and what my pay rate would be."
Me: "I can give you that information over the phone, actually. What’s your social security number?"
EE: "123-45-6789."
Me: "Okay, just a moment". (I look the person up in the system) "Okay, your pay rate would be $51.44 an hour."
EE: "That’s it?"
Me: (pauses) "Yes."
EE: "Even with all my experience?"
Me: (sighs internally) "Yes."
EE: "Why?"
Me: "That’s what’s in the union contract. There will also be a three percent raise in February."
If at this moment, you’re wondering how someone could think $51.44/hr. is meager compensation, it gets better…
EE: (resignedly) "Okay, well, I heard that you were giving bonuses to people who converted to benefited status?"
Me: "We had a temporary program last February through August, but it’s over now."
EE: "Why?"
Me: (pauses) "Because it ended in August."
EE: "But why?"
Me: "Because that’s what they decided. It was just a temporary program."
EE: (sighs) "Okay, well do I make an appointment to come in and sign paperwork for benefits?"
Me: "No, you actually do it all online."
EE: "So, what do I need to do?"
Me: (grits teeth) "You need to tell your manager that you want to convert to benefited status, they’ll send us the paperwork, then we’ll send you an offer letter with all of the information."
EE: "Okay. Thaaaank you."
Me: "You’re welcome. Bye."
It may seem like a pretty trivial gripe to post this, and I’m sure people who work at the DMV and such have it worse, but the employees at my company are highly paid professionals in their field, who perform quite complex tasks on an everyday basis. So you’d think that they could comprehend simple responses to basic questions without resorting to protesting the facts like a three-year old, n’est-ce pas?
