three sheets to the wind and how
I saw Ashton Kutcher on "The Jimmy Kimmel Live" show last night and was highly unimpressed. I thought he was supposed to be this big biomechanical engineering major smarty pants in real life, but he acted exactly like his doofus-y character on "That ’70s Show." Not to mention he was clearly high/drunk. I miss when he used to be this little kept secret star on TV who was just jaw droppingly hot. Now he’s omnipresent and then some. I guess it’s true–overexposure really does sort of water down the milk.
While on the subject of celebrities, a coif caveat to all ye non-famous ladies of the land:
You can relax. There’s no need to continue perpetuating that absurd hairstyle trend with the Paris Hilton upturned bouffant. The reason she looks like some mutant cow licked the whole upper side of her head is that she’s trying to distract you from her beady little eyes and broken finger of a nose. I’m sure she realizes that this is not France during the 1700s when such a look was popular among the French nobility. No, she just isn’t that pretty in real life. They should rename it "The Simpleton Life" and just film her going about her normal day in L.A.
Mind you, I love her to death, and would switch teams in a heartbeat to marry the bitch if the opportunity arose. I’d even befriend her if she’d learn a few more words. Actually, someone recently compared an old picture of me to her (sharp eye, J. Co. thanks for the laugh). Thank God some things have changed since then. *ahem*
Anyway, taking a PTO (paid time off) day Monday. Hope to catch up on some sleep. Must also prepare for code red of the roommate finding search. Stay dry, it’s supposed to rain this weekend. Add coral calcium to your vitamin supplement intake. Don’t forget that Mother’s Day is next month. And if that breathtaking Italo-Latino boy who takes the Treasure Island bus happens to be reading this, I want you, fyi.
